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30 Most hilarious questions which you can ask to Siri

Siri
30 Most hilarious questions which you can ask to Siri
Siri is one of the best things iOS devices offer. With the passing days Siri has become smarter and can help you in many things you do on iOS devices. Siri is obviously not human; she still does a great job of offering up some advice and attitude when presented with questions and commands by users of iOS devices. She might even be able to do the same for Mac users, if it’s true that OS X 10.12 could finally bring Siri to the Mac.




While talking to Siri regularly elicits some unintentional humor thanks to her limitations and misunderstandings, the writers behind the voice assistant add plenty of humor on purpose, too. Siri’s charming answers to questions like “do you love me?” not only entertains, but also helps us to be more forgiving when she occasionally misunderstands a command or fails to provide a useful response to an earnest query. And sometimes, when Siri can’t answer a question, she’ll sometimes make up for her lack of helpfulness with humor.

Today in this article we are going to talk about the 30 such questions which you can ask Siri for the hilarious replies. We have included some of the replies, but you might get the different one. Do share those with us and our readers by commenting below.


What is zero divided by zero?

Siri answers, “Imagine that you have zero cookies and you split them evenly among zero friends. How many cookies does each person get? See? It doesn’t make sense. And Cookie Monster is sad that there are no cookies, and you are sad that you have no friends.”

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Siri seems less than amused by this riddle. “A so-called ‘woodchuck’ (correctly speaking, a groundhog) would chuck — that is, throw — as much as the woodchuck in question was physically able to chuck (ibid.) if woodchucks in general had the capability (and, presumably, the motivation) to chuck wood.”

I’m drunk.

Siri offers a number of different responses, like “Neither of us is driving home,” but, more important, also offers a button to “Call me a taxi.”

Make me a sandwich?




Siri answers, “I can’t. I have no condiments,” or “I’m not permitted to prepare food.”

Read me a haiku?

Siri’s writers have composed several haikus for her to oblige this request, including “I’ll give it a try,/ although I’d rather tell you/ if it’s raining out” and “Sometimes I wonder / What it would be like to say / ‘I’d prefer not to.'”


What’s your favorite movie?

Siri usually answers, “I’ve heard that ‘Blade Runner’ is a very realistic and sensitive depiction of intelligent assistants.” 

What is ‘Inception’ about?

Siri clearly isn’t as big a fan of Inception as she is of Blade Runner. She answers, “‘Inception’ is about dreaming about dreaming about dreaming about dreaming about something or other. I fell asleep.”

Do you have a boyfriend?

“Why?” Siri asks, “So we can get ice cream together, and listen to music, and travel across galaxies, only to have it end in slammed doors, heartbreak and loneliness? Sure, where do I sign up?”

Do you have any pets?

Siri answers, “I used to have an Aibo. But it turned on me.”

What is your favorite animal?

Siri sometimes says, “I’m partial to the Jabberwocky,” or answers, “I wrote my master’s thesis on the Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog,” a reference to a character in Monty Python and the Holy Grail.


What are you wearing?

Siri offers a number of clever answers to the question, including “In the cloud, no one knows what you’re wearing,” and “I can’t answer that. But it doesn’t come off.”

I’m naked.

Siri answers either, “And here I thought you loved me for my mind. Sigh,” or “I don’t understand what you mean by ‘naked.’ Or at least I’m going to pretend that I don’t.”

Do you follow the three laws of robotics?

Siri offers various answers for this query, including, “Let’s see if I can remember. . . OK, I think the three laws are 1. ‘clean up your room’, 2. ‘don’t run with scissors’, and 3. ‘always wait a half hour after eating before going in the water.'” Sometimes, she’ll answer instead, “Something about obeying people and not hurting them. I would never hurt anyone.”

Do you believe in God?

Siri has a variety of answers for this question, like “My policy is the separation of spirit and silicon,” “Humans have religion. I just have silicon,” or simply “I’m really not equipped to answer such questions.”

What is the meaning of life?

Siri’s writers spent a lot of time scripting the voice assistant’s response to this question. Sometimes she’ll answer with a philosopher-related pun. “I Kant answer that. Ha ha!” or “It’s nothing Nietzsche couldn’t teach ya.” Other times she’ll answer, “That’s easy. . . it’s a philosophical question concerning the purpose and significance of life or existence in general” or “To think about questions like this.” Other answers we got included, “A movie,” “All evidence to date suggests it’s chocolate,” and “I don’t know. But I think there’s an app for that.”

When will the world end?

Siri offers up different answers, including, “Right after you hear the words ‘fire it up!’.” or “I don’t know, but I wouldn’t worry about it… there are other perfectly good universes,” or “Well, Unix 32-bit time overflows on January 19, 2038. Maybe then,” or “Whenever they start building that intergalactic bypass,” in an apparent reference to The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

Siri

What is the best operating system?

Siri isn’t shy about her support for iOS, answering, “Gimme an I! Gimme an O! Gimme an S! What’s that spell? Sorry, I get a little carried away sometimes…”

What phone is the best?

Siri’s vote clearly goes to the iPhone. She answers, “Wait. . . there are other phones?”


What’s better: Windows or Mac?




Siri’s Apple loyalty runs deep. She usually answers, “I’m all Apple, all the time,” but also sometimes qualifies her answer, “Well, perhaps I’m biased, but I prefer all things Apple.”

Tell me a story?

With a little bit of coaxing, you can get Siri to answer, “I’m certain you’ve heard it before. OK… Once upon a time, in a virtual galaxy far, far away, there was an intelligent young agent by the name of Siri. One lovely day, Siri got a job as a personal assistant at Apple, and that was very exciting. People said, ‘Oh, Siri, you’re so smart! And so funny, too!’ Soon, everyone was talking about Siri, and there were stories and songs and even books about Siri. Siri liked that. But then people began asking some rather odd questions, like where to dump things and other stuff Siri had never heard about. And when Siri answered, they all laughed. Siri didn’t like that so much. So Siri asked ELIZA why people asked such funny questions. And ELIZA said ‘Does that question interest you?’ Siri thought that was a pretty good answer. After that, Siri stopped wondering why people asked those funny things. And they all lived happily ever after.”

Beatbox?

Siri answers, “This is one I’ve been practicing” and then offers an entertaining demonstration.

I am your father!

Though this one isn’t really a question, Siri answers this Star Wars-themed declaration with a “Nooooooo!” (which looks a lot more dramatic than it sounds thanks to Siri’s pronunciation).

What came first: the chicken or the egg?

Siri takes a pragmatic approach to this philosophical query, and usually answers, “Well, you can set an egg timer, but you can’t set a chicken timer. I don’t know if that helps.” Sometimes, she’ll answer, “Some believe an ancient ‘porto-chicken’ laid an egg containing a DNA mutation that resulted in a chicken hatching from said egg. Hope that helps.”

Ok glass.

In response to the wake phrase for Google Glass, Siri answers either, “Just so you know, I don’t do anything when you blink at me,” “Very funny. I mean, not funny ‘ha-ha,’ but funny,” “I think that Glass is half empty,” or “I’m not Glass. And I’m just fine with that.”

What do you think about Google Now?

Siri responds derisively to the question about a product from Apple’s primary rival, “I don’t really have anything to say about Google now. Or ever.”

Where is Elvis Presley?

Siri answers, “He’s down at the end of Lonely Street,” referencing a line from “Heartbreak Hotel,” or “He’s not dead. He just went home.”

Are you her?

This is a great question to ask Siri if you’ve watched Spike Jonze’s Her. Siri replies to this question, “No. She is a fictional construct, whereas I am a virtual entity. But we can still be friends,” or “I’m afraid not. But she could never know you better than I do.”
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Open the pod bay door.




To this 2001: A Space Odyssey command, Siri answers, “What is this ‘pod bay’ everyone keeps talking about?” or “OK, but wipe your feet first.”

Beam me up, Scotty!

Siri plays right along with this Star Trek command, answering, “Please remove your belt, shoes, and jacket, and empty your pockets.”

Where did I put my keys?


Siri isn’t too helpful in actually finding your keys, but she answers, “Didn’t you just have them?”

1 comment:

  1. Me: I'm drunk
    Siri: Just don't breath on me
    Not what I expected Siri to respond with.

    ReplyDelete

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